Sweet, sweet justice

Today's post is about traffic and idiot drivers. Super exciting stuff, but Jamie is gone again and I'm bored.

I drive to Florissant often. My parents live there, my church is there, my hair dresser is there- it's just a good place to go. I'd still be living in Florissant paying an embarrassingly small amount of money for rent for a house next door to my grandparents if it weren''t for Jamie. Or I could be living literally next door to my parents if it weren't for Jamie. That dude seriously hates Florissant. Or my family. Who can tell, really? 

Anywho, to get to Florissant I have to drive down 170. I guess that would be north. Cardinal directions are not my strong suit. I think down is a more appropriate description anyway. Or to the left. So I'm headed left down 170 and after 70 it's two lanes, and then an exit only, do-not-cross-this-straight-white-line lane appears for Boeing people which I will never understand. Why does Boeing have it's own lane? I use to drive left down 170 every morning for five years for work, and that lane is never packed with cars, there doesn't seem to be a mad rush of Boeing employees in that lane, and where does it really go anyway? Straight to the parking lot? To the front door? There is really no way of telling as I am not a special Boeing employee and I'm scared to go down that lane and there would be a security guard or something, or some kind of machine where I have to scan my card to continue, or maybe a parking lot that you can't get out of without scanning some special Boeing card and then I'd be trapped there forever. So it's not worth the risk. And if there's one thing I'm not known for, it's being a risk taker. Who has the time or the energy really? We're going to Colorado this summer and I was thinking in the car today 'I should surprise Jamie with a white water rafting trip, but this time I'll go with him (last time I made him go with a friend),' and even THINKING about it, my eyes teared up a little. And whilst I type this, my heart has started to race and I'm breathing a little faster. It's almost like Jamie's entered the room. HA!!!!!

I will not be white water rafting this summer. I'm going to go ahead and blame my mom for this fear because we used to go to church camp in Colorado every summer and one time my mom went white water rafting (which is kind of shocking now that I think about it) and she was like, 'It's very dangerous, if I don't ever see you again, I love you, blah, blah, blah,' so I sat there the whole time she was gone completely freaked out and convinced she was going to die. She didn't, so you would think that this would be a lesson learned for me and I should be brave like my mom, but no, that is not how this story turns out. I will never be as brave as my mom which is saying a LOT. Poor Jamie. I hope his next wife has a sense of adventure.

Anyrandomwhitewaterraftingstory, back to the Boeing lane, so these asshole, non-Boeing employees like to use this lane as like a drag racing lane to speed down 170 and then when the lane ends and they have to get off to enter the mysterious Boeing land, they cut over into the left lane, which is where I always am, because I am a responsible driver and I know that I need to be in that lane for my quickly approaching exit onto 270 left. So these jerks jack everything up for everyone in this lane, and then we're constantly hitting the brakes until you pass the B.L. (I'm tired of typing Boeing lane), because of these ignorant motherfuckers. That's right, I just majorly cursed on this blog. And I really didn't want to have to do that ever. But these B.L. douchebags makes me SO ANGRY you don't even know and there is really no other way to describe them.

BUT TODAY! TODAY! The best day EVER! Today, there was a cop strategically parked right at the little triangle shoulder thingy next to the exit sign at the B.L, and this marroon butthole car did the ignorant MFer thing of cutting people off at the last possible second to get in the 270 left lane and as soon as he did, I saw the brake lights go off on the police car and watched him get behind that ignorant MFer and pull. his. douchey. ass. over. It was so great. SO, so great. I cheered and really confused the kids, but I think they could feel my passion and could sense that they just very passively witnessed a great moment in criminal justice history. A moment I will never forget. Definitely a blog-worthy moment, wouldn't you agree?

Someone please come and entertain me.