Tuesday, July 7, 2015

Two for Tuesday

Last week at karate there was a dad who was wearing a shirt that said Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced. On the front of his shirt. It pretty much took up the whole front of his shirt. Now the class is for 4, 5 and 6 year-olds so I don't think any of the kids could read it (I haven't spotted any super geniuses yet), but come on. COME ON. People make weird choices. Also, who had a child with this man? AND, not one person kissed him during karate class so the shirt is obviously broken, it has no powers of persuasion left. This shirt knocked the #hangry shirt that one of the mom's wears every single week out of the top spot of my karate parent judgment circle. I am a black belt in silently judging, it's a great time-killer.

We have an electric stove which I hate, but am adjusting my cooking to, but something I cannot adjust to is every time I'm standing next to it stirring a pot or flipping a quesadilla (H eats a lot of quesadillas) my stomach hits the on button for the burners and turns a burner on. Like every time. It's like my stove is taunting me. I've taken to sucking my stomach in while cooking like the stove is a cute guy or something. I've decided I'll just start cooking in a corset, a quick google search gave me many options, but after a few seconds of research I ordered this one.
This is the Seed of Life corset, it just looked the most ME to me.
I'm trying to do as much psychological damage as possible to my kids while they're young. That's really what a mom's job is, don't you think? Let's get cookin'!

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